Migraine – Be Gone

I have had a migraine headache for 5 continuous days now. To begin with painkillers would alleviate the pain for a while, but ultimately the pain would return. After three days, painkillers and my prescribed drugs stopped working… It’s a grand life!

This morning (day 5) I began thinking, maybe slightly deliriously, what would I do to finally do to get rid of this headache once and for all; this is what I came up with.

  • Return to the Stone Age and whittle the hind leg bone of an animal and trepanning my skull and see if the evil spirits escape my head, because surely anything that hangs around for this long must be Supernatural.
  • Have Miley Cyrus re-enact the Wrecking Ball music video and have a wrecking ball smashed into my head over and over. This would surely be preferable to having no real reason for the pain!
  • I would like to have one of the remaining 3 White Rhinos come into my small Front Room and continually run and gore me in the head! This would ultimately render me unconscious, something I have been unable to achieve naturally in the past week.
  • Call in Father’s Karras & Merrin for a Quick Exorcism – Can’t hurt any and I wouldn’t mind being tied to the bed for a week or two! I could catch up on some of the radio plays I have missed whilst not being able to concentrate due to the headaches.
  • I here by offer to babysit a roomful of colicky babies for a full 24 hours, this would preferably take place all in one room as the screaming would obviously be a hell of a lot less painful than what is going on in my head right now!
  • If this migraine isn’t resolved by midweek, I may have to resort to extreme measures. I may have to bring out the Justin Bieber and 5 Seconds of Summer CD’s obviously this is a last resort as this would constitute a mental torture and could end up scarring me for life, but drastic times call for drastic measures! Please don’t ask what happens if it lasts to the weekend… 1D.

So those are my options. Anyone else have any others? Drop them in the comments section or over on Facebook, at this point I am open to anything as you can probably see.

Until next time…

GIF credit goes to reaction.com via giphy.com